I will be the first to admit my mistakes. The constant alcohol abuse and the irrelevant drug taking to increase my confidence or sexual activity. I won't claim maturity since but this time, I regret my decisions.
However inconclusive my life is, its mine and I disrupt the effort of ex-friends to destroy my present, future and release my future. I scorn you with secrets we once giggled about and longed to scream to the skies.
I now hinder the consequences of drugs and alcohol, in which are not health related.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Just another part of the black lung process.
"as i rolled my cigarettes
into pipe dreams;
i watched strands of pube
like tobacco falter
and stream downward
to sink into the carpet
with the other shit
that's always left behind."
[28-10-2009]
Heather Harvey.
Officially quit smoking on Saturday [12-12-09]. The need to smack my fist into walls has failed to proceed so far, for which I am the least bit grateful. I don't "long" for a dose of nicotine; I guess it's almost like the loss of someone close. I confided in these sticks; ever since I remember, from first peer pressure puff to lasting addiction I've decided to snuff.
The longest friend in a metaphorical sense. Some people would argue that friends would not burden yourself with bad health; yet some arguments are a circular battle and see no end when two beings are as stubborn as the stem of weeds.
I never drink alone; my friends always hinder my hip bones whilst we play Russian roulette with our health. We ignite the kingdom of fantasy; we elope as individual but somehow along the line, our hands are always conjoined.
As friends we sign agreements not to sue when we die. When Harry died of a heart failure, his woe's deemed more demanding than his highs in this life or when Carmen caught herself on a highway to hell, driving in control of a high speed car. Well, we all know she ended in bits and bruised bones.
We endanger our health with soul consent. But as friends we do this, as a Mother now; I refuse to envelope this fetus like peanut into my world with unwritten consent.
The longest friend in a metaphorical sense. Some people would argue that friends would not burden yourself with bad health; yet some arguments are a circular battle and see no end when two beings are as stubborn as the stem of weeds.
I never drink alone; my friends always hinder my hip bones whilst we play Russian roulette with our health. We ignite the kingdom of fantasy; we elope as individual but somehow along the line, our hands are always conjoined.
As friends we sign agreements not to sue when we die. When Harry died of a heart failure, his woe's deemed more demanding than his highs in this life or when Carmen caught herself on a highway to hell, driving in control of a high speed car. Well, we all know she ended in bits and bruised bones.
We endanger our health with soul consent. But as friends we do this, as a Mother now; I refuse to envelope this fetus like peanut into my world with unwritten consent.
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